Last weekend my husband and I ventured out for a Sunday afternoon at a pub to farewell some friends (former colleagues) who are leaving the city to move to a regional beachside location.
I had arranged to pick up another friend on the way who has been one of my drinking buddies for years. We've been to the races together, partied together, and in later years spent afternoons getting happily sozzled at wineries.
When I offered to pick her up on the way she sent me an SMS saying thank you and that she'd buy our drinks. I remarked to my husband that we'll be cheap dates!
When we arrived at the pub we came clean about not drinking and explained about the surgery. She was surprised but it was no big deal. I drank cloudy apple juice and my husband had Heineken 0.0.
The most intriguing observation of the entire afternoon was that we re-connected with people who I've worked with years ago and had not seen for a long time and not one of them asked me a question about what I was up to these days.
People were entirely self-absorbed.
I left the pub after three hours and in the car on the way home I shared my observation that the only way anyone would have any clue about my life is if they've asked me a question, which they didn't.
I, on the other hand, knew who was divorced, what plans people had made for Christmas, where they worked now and a host of other information.
So, does alcohol breed preoccupation with one's own life at the expense of curiosity about others?
I intend to find out.
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