Popcorn

 I went back to Pilates last week when I returned to work. Karen, my teacher, works me hard. So much so I can feel my glute muscles all the way through the week to my next class.

She observed that I was still glowing from my time away. I told her I’d quit drinking and that was more likely the source of the glow. She was amazed I hadn’t mentioned it. 

When I reflected on this conversation later two things became startlingly clear. I am no longer embarrassed, trying to hide or uncomfortable with telling people I’m not drinking. But perhaps more importantly, it feels normal.

Karen asked if I’d found it difficult and I sad yes I had, particularly in the first month and in the lead up to Christmas. But the words that came naturally afterwards made me realise how far I’d come. I said to Karen, I don’t even think about it anymore. And that’s true. On the weekends when I slow down a bit and have time to think, I don’t even think about having a glass of wine. The connection between Friday and Saturday nights, watching movies and drinking wine has been broken. It’s not a habit anymore. 

That’s a milestone if ever I saw one. However my popcorn consumption has increased exponentially...

Because COVID

During our first lockdown the bottle shops were doing a roaring trade. Massive queues at the drive through bottle-o’s.

We drank a lot. Most nights. Our immediate family live in three different countries. I was stressed about my parents and parents in law who live overseas. I wondered if I should reach out to the brother I haven’t spoken to in three years. My daughter was not coping at school and was utterly miserable. Work was crazy busy, long days. 

When COVID eased up and went back to the office I discovered a colleague had used the COVID period to lose weight. 23 kilos in fact.

She looked amazing and unrecognizable. So while we were chugging back the booze and increasing our Naked Wines subscription she’d been using the non commute time to exercise.  No social occasions and work functions meant it was much easier for her to give up alcohol.

Why didn’t I think about doing that? 

We’ve just gone into a new lockdown here. This time I won’t be wasting it. 

Namaste

Secret Sober Yogi xx

Networking

One of my biggest challenges in giving up alcohol has been how to deal with work or networking functions.

I go to ALOT of networking functions. I am a networking queen.

People will notice I’m not drinking. They might think I’m pregnant. No. Unlikely. I’m nearer menopause. They might think I’m menopausal. Or a recovering alcoholic. This isn’t good.

I have a networking lunch coming up next week. The wine will be good - that’s annoying. It’s a flat fee which will include the wine, that’s even more annoying. What’s with that?

What are my alternative drinking options? Should I call the restaurant beforehand and check what they have? I don’t want to be drinking sparkling water. I also don’t want to be drinking some sweet syrupy thing if we’re having a good piece of meat. That needs a wine match. Clearly. By a good sommelier. Will they even have a sommelier? Ok, STOP.

I’m overthinking this. 

How difficult can it be to go to one lunch and not drink any alcohol?

I drank sparkling water. It didn’t pair well with the medium rare kangaroo fillet.

I made some topical observations. I was witty and clever (completely subjective opinion of course). 

I didn’t make any commentary when the only other female at the lunch knocked over her glass of red wine all over the table and down her dress. 

I just gave a silent thanks it wasn’t me. 

Doing it for the dog

I have a really clever friend who founds start ups. His most recent tech start up is an machine learning eCommerce platform for small and medium businesses. With my marketing background I was really intrigued by this new venture and wanted to hear all about it. So a few weeks ago we arranged to meet him and his wife at a local pub for a catch up. 

We really enjoy their company. They’re big drinkers and we have such a laugh. I have absolutely no idea how many bottles we got through that afternoon but I know it was a lot because a) the bill was massive and we hardly had any food and b) I felt terrible the next day. 

When I say terrible I mean AWFUL. More terrible that I’d felt in a long time. The following day I spent the day on the sofa watching Netflix. I couldn’t manage to do anything else. 

I couldn’t even manage to take the dog for a walk, which is one of my favourite things to do (see my love list - it’s top of the list) He looked sad all day. He has this gorgeous brown eyes that look at you with love or in this case utter disappointment and judgement.

The dog did not deserve this. 

Since we stopped drinking the dog has been in heaven. We walk for hours. He’s a Kelpie and we tire him out! If you’re not familiar with Kelpies, they need a lot of exercise. A day without a walk is not a good day for a Kelpie.

https://dogtime.com/dog-breeds/australian-kelpie

Even if we weren’t doing this for ourselves, it appears we’d be doing it for the dog. 

Rapture

I was out shopping in David Jones (that’s an Australian department store that believe it or not is still going).

I was looking for a black blazer, playing it safe for work when I spotted the most magnificent leather jacket by Sass and Bide. I have never owned anything by this label. They have the most magnificent clothes, a Melbourne label worn by celebrities all over the world. 

https://www.sassandbide.com/

For quite some time I skulked around the rack wondering what to do. I really wanted to try it on. 

The jacket is called ‘The Rapture Jacket’ and it comes in Forest Green which Trinny and Susannah confirmed for me many years ago is a colour I should embrace at every opportunity. Plus I t was reduced from $950 to $450 so you can see my dilemma. 

$450 is not the sort of money I can spend without consulting my husband. We’re pretty good at discussing large purchases and I’ve never been the person who spends huge amounts on clothes. Probably one of the reasons he married me.

In the end I walked away. Now is not the time to be buying expensive leather jackets.

However I was still feeling resentful that my husband had spent $450 on wine at a cellar door when we were away camping for October school holidays. Wine..jacket...hmm. I weigh it up. I’m definitely choosing the jacket. 

If this six months alcohol free works in the weight loss department I’m buying this jacket or something similar. I’ll have saved way more than that on wine we haven’t bought. 

Bring on that moment of Rapture!

Wine Wednesday

Since we decided to go booze free I’ve become obsessed by finding out about other people’s drinking habits. How much do they drink? When? What do they drink?

A few years ago when my husband and I were going through a difficult period in our marriage I instigated Wine Wednesday’s. When the kids went to bed we’d sit at the kitchen table, get tipsy and in doing so we were able to talk freely and without inhibition about our issues. 

Since then Wednesday has been the only workday weekday that alcohol is consumed in our household. It’s not a strict rule, rather a framework that makes sure we have a number of alcohol free days each week.

A couple of months ago I was out for dinner with a small party of people including two women. The conversation turned to our various lifestyles and one of the women mentioned that she has a no alcohol policy on Sundays and Mondays and the other said she doesn’t drink on Mondays or Tuesdays.

My mother in law is trying to lose some weight so she’s only drinking on Saturday nights but I’ve noticed that on these nights she appears to make up for abstaining the rest of the week.

My father in law has a large Rye Whisky (or two) every night.

My neighbour doesn’t have a rule but then he has a rather active social life which may not be conducive to implementing an AFD framework. 

Dr Michael Apstein, who has the unusual distinction of being both a wine writer and a liver doctor, suggests that people should have at least two alcohol free days per week. His article about whether taking a month off alcohol is beneficial is here 

https://www.decanter.com/learn/is-dry-january-beneficial-287019/

I have been known to be competitive so it makes me feel smug that we’re overachieving with seven. Cheers!