The heart matters

So, as you know, my husband has to have open heart surgery next year. He had another consultation with the specialist today and brought home a pile of leaflets. I felt nauseous reading them.

Ever the optimist I consider the silver linings.

1) We have great life insurance. 

2) Our trauma insurance will pay out.

Are you wondering if I’m too focused on the financial benefit of my husband’s major surgery? 

Indeed I was, until surgery became the catalyst for giving up the booze. Now I’m focussed on our health and the positive lifestyle changes which are coming with it. 

We have never embarked on a long dry period together before. We seem to be closer because of it.

It’s made me ponder that the heart, both literally and figuratively, matters. 

Namaste

Secret Sober Yogi xx

Namaste

Every Monday night I spend 90 minutes in skimpy clothing contorting my body into 26 yoga poses while sweating profusely in front of a floor to ceiling mirror in a room heated to 40 degrees C. 

Each week I show up on the mat reluctantly because I know the class is going to be hell and each week I leave the practice feeling amazing. I sleep deeply and the next morning I feel on top of the world. 

Bikram Yoga is addictive. But it’s also incredibly confronting. The practice exposes every weakness, every vulnerability, every insecurity you have both mentally and physically. 

One pose, Camel Pose or Utrasana is supposed to open the heart. If you’re feeling at all emotional Camel Pose can literally make you cry. 

To get the best out of a Bikram class you should be well hydrated, well rested and have had nothing to eat in the two hours before class. During those 90 minutes you will get to know your body and mind deeply and intensely. 

Bikram and alcohol do not mix. Alcohol is a diuretic. It causes your body to remove fluids from your blood. I have endeavoured to do many a class on a day after drinking. 

After nearly six weeks alcohol free the difference in my practice is unbelievable. My balance has never been so good. I can much more easily bat away thoughts that would normally distract me until at least a third of the way through the class when my mind finally quietens, my body feels like it’s been lubricated with oil and my poses are deeper. 

If you’ve never practiced Bikram Yoga and have no idea what I’m talking about check out this video of the world champion Kasper Van Den Wijngaard - it’s quite something what the body can do when it’s at its peak physique. 

Namaste

https://youtu.be/PLBOsOt3qtc

Because COVID

During our first lockdown the bottle shops were doing a roaring trade. Massive queues at the drive through bottle-o’s.

We drank a lot. Most nights. Our immediate family live in three different countries. I was stressed about my parents and parents in law who live overseas. I wondered if I should reach out to the brother I haven’t spoken to in three years. My daughter was not coping at school and was utterly miserable. Work was crazy busy, long days. 

When COVID eased up and went back to the office I discovered a colleague had used the COVID period to lose weight. 23 kilos in fact.

She looked amazing and unrecognizable. So while we were chugging back the booze and increasing our Naked Wines subscription she’d been using the non commute time to exercise.  No social occasions and work functions meant it was much easier for her to give up alcohol.

Why didn’t I think about doing that? 

We’ve just gone into a new lockdown here. This time I won’t be wasting it. 

Namaste

Secret Sober Yogi xx

Secretly Sober

When my husband decided not to drink in preparation for his operation I felt a sense of relief. If I’m being 100% honest with myself I’ve wanted to do this for a while. 

I’d been given this wonderful reason to stop drinking. 

Doing it together has been great because we can talk about what we‘ve been experiencing. 

Poo has featured more in our conversations than I care for.

Sleep has been amazing.

My skin looks fantastic.

Zero indigestion.

Waves of contentment.

Moments of euphoria.

One month in and we are feeling good. We’ve told our parents we aren’t drinking because we need him to go into this operation as healthy as possible and I’ve told my best friend but I haven’t told anyone else.

We are secretly sober. 

It appears we have been experiencing the pink cloud. While this is a term used by Alcoholics Anonymous it is fitting to use because the moments of euphoria have come unexpectedly and in waves.

It’s like being high on life. 

I know this sounds utterly ridiculous, my senses are alive and it feels wonderful.

Namaste

Secret Sober Yogi xx

Couch to 5k

I've never been a runner. All that puffing and panting, sweat and effort. Shin splints, knee injuries, chafing. What could possibly be the attraction?

Last year I started a new job and one of our sponsorships was a breast cancer fundraiser run so I thought it would be cool to be able to run it.

I had visions of surprising colleagues and friends, 'I never knew you could run!'. 'Yeah, just knocked out an easy 6kms' I would say.

I wasn't sure how to get started and I didn't want to ask my runner friends.  

At the time one friend was posting Facebook posts of her regular 10km runs.

A former colleague was posting Facebook posts of her regular 20km trail runs.

I had a long way to go. Baby runner. Just born. Red, wrinkly and crying. 

God love the NHS. They have a free Couch to 5k app with the lovely Laura. I got started by driving to a housing estate with little roads where I didn't know anyone who lived there.  

I remember those first few times I could manage to run from one end of the little cul-de-sacs to the other. 

It took me four months of running three times a week to run 5kms. I was so proud of my achievement.

Running is amazing. I feel fantastic afterwards. There’s a reason they call it the runner’s high.

The first 15 minutes is the hardest, then my body seems to accept I'm running and I get a second wind. If my legs are feeling strong, my breath allows the run to be relatively easy.

I’ve been running more since I stopped drinking. My breath is coming more easily and I’m picking up the pace.

Last week I watched the movie Brittany Runs a Marathon. She quit drinking and partying, started training and ran the New York Marathon.

If she can do it...